Time to go home

How do you know when it's time to leave the party? Answer: When both of your children have thrown up.

Friday evening, my husband's family gathered at his Grandmother's house following the funeral. Things were really going quite well. We had survived the funeral, the burial at the cemetery, and the dinner with no major disasters.

It did take three pieces of gum and a package of M&M's (and a pacifier) for my two-year-old to keep quiet during the funeral. The kids did not ride in car seats in the funeral procession. Nonetheless, for being the only (idiots) parents with children under the age of five at the funeral, I was quite pleased with our performance.

However, Friday evening was a disaster.

Tucker was the first to send his supper spewing across the kitchen floor. He was sitting on my lap gnawing on a sugar cookie (Gasp - what sort of mother gives a seven month old a cookie?) when he broke off a chunk of cookie and proceeded to choke. The chunk broke free from his esophagus, as well as the bottle he had just finished, and hurled down my leg and on to the kitchen floor.

About an hour later, I was rocking Tucker to sleep in the living room. Daddy, Noah and a two-year-old cousin were rough-housing on the floor. Noah - still recovering from a nasty cough - went into a coughing spell. The rough-housing / football had taken her breath away. She (skip ahead if you have a weak stomach) gagged on some phelm and puked up her beef and noodles on the spot. I passed the baby off to his Aunt, and scooped up Puker #2 spreading the second round of up-chuck all over me. I was really beginning to smell nicely.

Needless to say, we gathered our things and headed back to our lodging at Aunt Karen's house.

Tucker's spewing seemed to be an isolated incident, while Noah's lasted through the evening. Daddy fell victim to the same stomach bug, and surrendered to the toilet gods for the rest of the night.

After a rough night, we loaded our things and headed for home promptly the next morning. Daddy and the kids were in bed by 7:30 pm. I'm running on Dr Pepper and plan to have things Cloroxed and Lysoled by morning.


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