Surviving

The range of emotions motherhood has brought upon me this weekend have run the gamut. Maybe it's the anxiety of the holidays; maybe it's the flu strain that just won't quit; maybe it's the clutter consuming every room of my house; maybe it's wailing coming from my daughter's bedroom as she tries to go to sleep without her pacifier. Whatever it is, I've felt anger, frustration, peace, pride, and satisfaction all in a matter of a few minutes.

There really, really isn't anything in your life you could possibly do to prepare you for your role as a mommy. I have a stack of books beside my bed offering the best advice on how to care for babies. I have read all the magazines and websites. But none of that can ready your heart for the emotions motherhood brings.

Truthfully, that's the reason I am blogging. I know there are lessons to learn amidst the tears and toys and clutter and tantrums. Yet in the heat of those intense mommy moments, I'm just trying to survive. And I am hoping that as I peck away at my keyboard, those dark moments give way to brighter memories of loving my children through our best and worst days.