Party Girl 2015
It’s unlike me to be unprepared.
Sure, it happens from time to time. I forget to return papers to school here, key
ingredients forgot at the store there. I’m
a list-maker; day planner; set an extra reminder on the iPhone kinda’ gal. These lapses in preparedness leave me utterly
frustrated.
So when I arrived at my parent’s house for a three day stay
over Thanksgiving without a toothbrush, a clean bra, pajamas, or underwear –
yet remembering absolutely every stinkin’ thing for every other member of my
family, not to mention an extra batch of dinner rolls and a gallon of soup and
dozens of eggs – you can only imagine my utter frustration.
Arriving on the eve of Thanksgiving, there wasn’t time to
drive to the big city for my forgotten essentials. I scavenged for an extra toothbrush, slept in
some of Brent’s extra clothes, and washed my undies each morning.
On Black Friday afternoon, my sister and I made a quick trip
to the big city. I had an errand to run
at the mall; she said she had coupons for Victoria’s Secret. Praise
the Lord.
I headed straight to the back of the store, where they keep
the plain, cotton panties. I reached for
the bottom drawer, way in the back, and pulled out five pair (because it’s always
a better deal when you buy five; every girl knows that): two greys, a navy
blue, a white and a beige. I paused for
a moment and thought about a red pair, challenging my inner Sarah Plain & Tall, but noticed
there was some writing on the back side and quickly put down the red
panties.
We stopped at HyVee on the way home for Mucinex, a bottle of
wine and peppermint mocha coffee creamer.
That’ll cure what ails ya.
Fast forward to early, dark early, Saturday morning. I’m digging clothes out of my bag and getting
dressed for a fun day in the even bigger city with my mom and sisters. By the light of my iPhone, I pull out my
clothes for the day. The light of my
phone caught something that shimmered. Strange, I didn’t bring anything that’s
shimmery. I don’t even own anything that
shimmers.
I tip toe downstairs to the bathroom to get dressed. I reach for a clean, new pair of plain grey undies,
and that something shimmery is staring right back at me. In large, shimmery script letters across the rear-end
side of the plain grey undies, is the phrase…
party girl 2015.
I can’t believe what I’m seeing. I’m without words. Wholly embarrassed. Sensing the self-deprecating humor.
I tip toe to the kitchen to show Brent and Mom my shimmery
undies. They spewed coffee and
peppermint mocha creamer across the kitchen table. I tip toe back upstairs to find the actual
plain grey undies.
I still have the party
girl panties. They’re in the back of
my drawer, and serve as my emergency pair for the day the washing machine
breaks down. Which will inevitably
happen on the same day I end up in the emergency room wearing the party girl panties much to the surprise
of the local doctors.
You can bet I’ll never forget to pack my undies again.
So whether or nor we're prepared for what 2015
has to offer, when we find ourselves surprised by something shimmery and
unexpected, just remember, it’ll make a great story.
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